And Carrie On

One of my favorite strategies to help bring new people together is setting norms. It’s one of the most underrated activities but has a big return on investment.

Norm – a principle of right action binding upon the members of a group and serving to guide, control, or regulate proper and acceptable behavior.

Merriam Webster

Some of the places I’ve used norms to help build relationships include:

• Campus Committees
• Cross-functional teams
• Office Staff
• Volunteer Groups

How Norms Help:

Guiding Behavior

I find norms are most helpful in low-trust or no trust environments. When people are coming together for the first time, norms are a great way to set expectations about how the team will work together. When people don’t know one another well (or maybe distrust each other) norms can provide guidelines for actions the group should adhere to as well as provide guidance of what behaviors are both appropriate and problematic.

Accountability

Especially in low-trust or new environments, people are not sure how to provide feedback about other’s actions. I find that norms can be helpful by creating a shared sense of ownership. When norming is done well, everyone agrees to follow the norms and the communal power of not letting the group down is strong. Additionally, when course correction must happen, it’s much easier to frame feedback in terms of not meeting a group norm, as opposed to a personal critique.

Efficiency

Negotiating behavior and figuring out how to navigate situations takes a great deal of time, especially if the group is new or there isn’t much trust. I have found norms can help address this. Spending time on the front-end setting norms as a team takes time. However, cumulatively, it takes less time (I believe) to set the norms at the onset of the relationship than it does to renegotiate behaviors for every interaction. Spending the time on the front-end setting the norms, helps the team move faster and more efficiently when it’s time to get into the work.

Trust and Safety

Chance are, you’ve been part of a group where someone didn’t have to follow the same rules as everyone else. If you’ve watched that happen, it doesn’t feel great. When norms are established, it helps to eliminate this because everyone agrees on the standards and follows them. If this practice holds up over time, members feel more secure and comfortable being vulnerable and open in the group because the same standards apply to all.

How to Develop Norms

If you’re new to norming, here’s the process to develop norms:

1. Brainstorm appropriate norms as a group – Schedule time to sit down together and go through what norms will help the team work well together. If you’re the leader of the process, you may want to have some starting ideas. Some safe choices could be: polite technology, assume good intent, be present and prepared.
2. Record responses – It’s really important to write all ideas down. This is a moment for open brainstorming, so it’s critical to collect all ideas and write them down. This is not a moment for judgment. Instead, focus on capturing all responses.
3. Clarify – Once you’ve gathered responses, ask team members to clarify what they mean in their suggestions. This helps to create a shared understanding of what something means. For example, it’s helpful to frame how you view polite technology, as your view might be different than mine. Figuring out those differences early is helpful.
4. Condense and combine – Chances are in the clarifying process, there’s some overlap. Several people may be approaching the same thing, from a slightly different perspective. There may also be some norms that are no longer needed after another norm is implemented. Take the time to condense and combine these norms together.
5. Consensus – Once the norms have been identified, it’s critical to reach consensus. This is important to ensure adoption. Each team member should have the opportunity to suggest final edits to the norms and signify their agreement with them. This is also a good opportunity to discuss an accountability process as well.
6. Replication – The final step is capturing the norms and making sure each member has a copy for reference. This helps signify this work is important and meaningful.

Moving Forward

Once you have norms in place, it’s important to revisit them annually to make sure the norms still work. Also, as team members or the role of the group changes, it’s important to review and adjust as needed.

Happy Norming!